Think about it...when you DON'T engage with a woman, you're safe. You haven't put any of yourself out there. You haven't taken any risk or made any commitment of your time.
You're not afraid of rejection. Rejection is safe.
Suppose you DO roll up on a girl & he shuts you down cold. Again, you haven't made any commitment of your time besides the little you already spent. You're essentially back to where you started with the ladies, & the risk you've taken has been minimal. You haven't given her any opportunity to really judge you. You haven't let her get close to affect your feelings. Essentially, rejection is a NEAR-ZERO RISK situation.
No...what you're afraid of is ACCEPTANCE.
You're not worrying, "Oh my God, what if he turns me down?" That would be the easiest way out of the situation you're putting yourself in to. What you're saying to yourself is, "Oh my God, what if he says YES?"
If he gives you her number or agrees to a date, then all of a sudden you have a RESPONSIBILITY. You're committed to furthering the sarge. You're forced to expose more of yourself as you spend more time with this girl. Suddenly, what you do takes on a whole new level of importance!
- If you spend time with her, you'll have to spend time with all her friends, who will ALSO judge you.
The worst of you with women have never even BEEN at this level before. The rest have been exposed to it at some level, but this "performance anxiety" is what REALLY stresses you out.
- You'll actually have to find creative ways to spend your time, now that you're with her, because before, lying on your couch, you only disappointed yourself.
- If he accepts you, then you'll have to set aside time you were using for something else, or saving for God knows what, to spend with HER.
reckon of all the responsibility!! So much easier to...
- You'll have to become educated, learn to dress nice, make the money to keep step with everything you want to do, learn to socialize with other human beings, & learn to have FUN at the same time!
That's right...the reason a lot of you get rejected with women is because you SABOTAGE your own approach. Sure, you'll go up & run your so-called "Game", but that voice inside of you that fears all this initiation will keep telling you, "If he accepts you, you're more screwed than you were before!" That will leak out in your mannerisms, in your nervous habits, in your awkward speech.
...SABOTAGE THE APPROACH!!
When you go to pick up a woman, you're not picking HER up. She's not livestock. You pick up a whole EXPERIENCE. You pick up a lifestyle adapt, EVEN if you're only with that girl long to get laid, EVEN if there's no relationship involved.
he will see this & HONOR YOUR REQUEST for rejection.
So the first thing you want to do...is decide whether you really want to have a go with women. It's not something you can do halfway, or they will reject you every single time. You either want women in your life YES, or you want women in your life NO.
Women aren't a commodity, they're an experience. What pushes you outside your comfort zone isn't expressing interest in the product, it's completing the transaction. It's COMMITTING to whatever the experience brings.
Like getting on a roller coaster, you can pretend that you're afraid you won't be THIS TALL to ride, but your real fear is that you WILL be, & five time that lap-bar comes down, you're committed to whatever comes next for at least the next several minutes.
and if you DO want them, then that doesn't mean you can approach, get digits, & then have booty on-tap like running water. It means you're going to be taken on a bit of a ride.
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2 comments:
i am afraid of rejection. lol. but i am not on the lookout (too busy for relationships), so at least none of that worries me! :)
hahah well if there is no worries in your life congratulation
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