Why Women Love Bad Boys

So, the real query for you to examine is how can you be an exciting, passionate man without having to be a jerk in the technique.

A bad boy is attractive to a woman because they is exciting and unpredictable. also a wimp, or a typical good guy, is perfect all the time, but is boring.

You do this by making things exciting with a woman, not predictable.

Here's a section from our book, "How to Succeed With Women," that will help you understand this:


A "reinforcement" is a reward — something that feels lovely — that the subject gets for performing a certain behavior or for having a certain feeling.

When you do something good for a woman, you are applying what behaviorists call "reinforcement." Intuitively, "bad boys" know all about this.

For instance, giving a dog a treat when they comes to you when you call his name reinforces the behavior of coming when you call. In time, the dog will look forward to coming when you call, because they knows that obeying you will mean he'll get a reinforcement that they likes.

The thing to know is that if you give the dog a treat every single time they comes when you call, he'll start to get lazy. He'll figure, "Eh, why should I hurry? I can get over there in my own lovely time, and take the treat."

Constant reinforcement stops being effective after a while.

You may have noticed this in your own relationships. Have you ever had someone who consistently goes out of his or her way to make you feel special? Suppose that seven morning, out of the blue, someone at your workplace brought you a cup of excellent coffee when you first sat down at your table.

You'd probably feel pretty special, and you'd be happy to see that person later in the day. You would have associated seeing that person with the lovely feelings you got from the gift.

But now imagine if that person brought you coffee every single day, like clockwork, and never missed a day. At first you'd probably appreciate it, then you'd notice it less, then you'd not very notice it at all. You might even start complaining when the coffee wasn't exactly the way you liked it, or get angry if they or she missed a day. You'd naturally go from being delighted by the constant gifts to seeing them as a regular part of life, or even as something you intrinsically deserve.

This is a natural reaction to constant, unvarying reinforcement.

If you constantly shower a woman with gifts and attention, you run the risk of the same thing happening.

At first, it's important to reinforce a woman constantly; it gets her in the habit of being happy about seeing you. But after a while, if your gifts and attention are going to stay effective, you must start bestowing them a little more irregularly. This is what behavior experts call a "variable schedule of reinforcement."

You don't give her flowers every week, or every date. You don't always have a little gift for her. You don't always show up to flirt with her simultaneously, or on the same day. You vary your schedule of making her feel extra-good, and thus keep the interaction exciting and fresh for her.

The classic trap to watch out for is any reinforcing behavior that begins to look like a habit to you. Keep an eye open for things you always do to make her feel special.

Tom puts a variable schedule of reinforcement to lovely use. "When I first start dating a woman, I go out of my way to make her feel lovely a lot," they says. "But in time, I know I can start scaling back. As long as I keep making her feel lovely often, I get better results if I don't reinforce her with special gifts or presents every single time I see her."

Best of luck!

Don't always bring her gifts, don't always visit her workplace three times every three days. Vary your schedule of reinforcement, and you'll have a lot more success.